The Bones are More Important than the Paint

image by Margaret Jacobsen

Have you ever seen a house built from beginning to end? When done right, that house can stand the test of time, mother nature, and more. Have you ever seen a house built on a cracked foundation? The effects of its shoddy craftsmanship ripple through the house, showing up as cracks in walls, and uneven flooring. No amount of spackle or paint will hide that weak foundation for long, eventually, the cracks will return and the floor will continue to shift beneath your feet. What does that have to do with you and your partner?

Well, as Maren Morris puts it, "when the bones are good the rest don't matter". Meaning, if you build your relationship right, the world around you can do its worst and the house you've built will stand strong.

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If building a strong marriage is more important than planning an epic wedding, let's talk, we may just be a perfect fit.

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The commitment to doing life with someone else is the biggest commitment you can make. It's a commitment to grow and change alongside someone else and building that life starts with a good foundation. That should take priority over the perfect wedding, I even believe it should be a higher priority than children (but that's a different blog post).

The ring, flowers, dress, and wedding are just the paint on what should be some exceptionally built bones. They are the decorative pieces that adorn your beautiful relationship and they shouldn't be on the table to discuss until you've built a solid beginning.

You will have years of trials, their family, your family, children, sex, frustrations, dissatisfaction, etc. You will face hard challenges, no really, let me say it for the people in the back, YOU WILL FACE HARD CHALLENGES. There's no way around that and that's ok, nothing worth having is ever easy.

Prioritize the bones. "The house don't fall when the bones are good".

Xx, Bethany

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Hey!

How's it going?

I'm Bethany!

I am a born and raised Oregon artist, photographer, and moment junkie.  Most days you can find me in a tattered eighties sweater and jeans, cold coffee in hand, chasing my kids.

Wedding Photography - What You're Paying For

You are paying an artist for their style, time, and expertise to preserve the biggest day of your life. So when you see varying priced packages, you may wonder, what is that all about? Are the prices arbitrary numbers selected to be competitive or do they actually represent a rate for a service or product you're purchasing?

Let me fill you in...

Like any expert, a photographer knows this process down to the minute. From the moment you start getting ready to when you'll meet up to look through your images. There is a rhythm and timeline to each part of this process and if done right, a photographer has done the work to calculate their pricing to reflect the time required to create and deliver exceptional images.

All that to say I can only speak for myself, and here's how mine breaks down,

Shoot Time

I have learned through the years that the amount of time required to capture a wedding depends on what the couple wants to preserve. You'll be so busy throughout the course of your day you probably won't notice my camera (you might not even notice me, haha, just kidding) but 6-hours is the minimum amount of time needed to capture your day. From getting ready thru the ceremony or the ceremony thru reception, 6 hours usually covers that. If that isn't enough time (and it wasn't for me) I, like most photographers, have additional packages to accommodate longer timeframes.

Editing Time

This is the bulk of the time, and the hardest to wrap one's mind around but let me help you out.

Once your guests have gone home, the celebration is cleaned up, and you (hopefully) are relaxing in a hot tub with your love, my work has just begun. At the end of a 6-hour day, I have between 500-600 images to process, curate, and stylize before I deliver the gallery to you. This takes 40-hours minimum.

Clerical Time

There is about 8-hours of clerical time for planning, updating you on progress, and reconnecting to deliver the finished gallery. I could skip this and go dark but if I did that, here's how that would go, at about week two of post wedded bliss, you'll start to wonder if you'll ever see your pictures, you might even be wondering if you were swindled by a snake-oil salesman. It's not a good feeling and the main reason why I have built into my process frequent and clear communication points.

Capturing this day is a really big deal, I don't take your trust in me and the decision to work with me for granted. Making time for clear communication is important to maintaining that trust and reassuring you that you made the best decision.

Bottom Line

Something as renewable and common as money shouldn't be calling the shots on how well the most important decision of your life is persevered. This decision is beautiful and worth more than all the money in the world. Be mindful of who you choose and make sure whoever you ask has an artistic style you love and who passionately pays attention to the details of your story.

Xx, Bethany

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Hey!

How's it going?

I'm Bethany!

I am a born and raised Oregon artist, photographer, and moment junkie.  Most days you can find me in a tattered eighties sweater and jeans, cold coffee in hand, chasing my kids.

3 Reasons You Should Have a Coordinator

Of all the services we had for our wedding this was one of two that was non-negotiable (I’m sure you can guess the other).

Prior to planning my wedding, I had attended my fair share as both a guest and photographer. The ones with no coordinator were, generally speaking (not always), dumpster fires. Nothing and everything was happening all at once, and like a car wreck, you couldn’t look away. Except the wreckage was people looking lost and wondering if the festivities were over and some people leaving before it's really begun. If you’re considering coordinating your own wedding I want to encourage you to give yourself the biggest gift and ask someone else to take this off your shoulders. Here's why...

Headspace.

I completely understand how and why someone might think they can coordinate their wedding and walk down the aisle, but you guys, making the plans and executing the plans are not the same.

I can see this bride, we are kindred spirits. She’s designing her invitations, foraging for her centerpieces (yes, foraging) and between juggling her work week and home life, she’s planning her wedding down to the most minute details. This girl can juggle spinning plates while balancing a ball on her nose. But this is one day where the ball and plates need to be handed off. This day is a rollercoaster of emotions and once in a lifetime experiences, be present for it.

Rhythm.

There is a rhythm to everything, even weddings. Your coordinator knows this and will be checking in on schedule and details you never realized you needed to be thinking about. Your focus should be on, making memories with your partner and the people that came to celebrate with you, not on making sure the buffet and coffee get restocked while the toasts are going on.

Outside Eyes.

When you’re swimming in the planning it can be hard to get your head above the details to see the holes that need plugging. Your coordinator will rock this. They are the designated problem anticipator and solver. My coordinator tackled a host of things I didn’t realize needed tackling on the day of. You need someone whose goal is to make sure this day is pulled off without a hitch (or at least someone who will navigate any issues so that to you it appeared hitchless).

If you need someone to give you permission, I’m volunteering. For this one day, give yourself the biggest gift of a break and outsource the hosting. It could be a pro or your great aunt Shirley. Whoever it is, find someone other than you to take the lead. You will not regret it.

Xx, Bethany

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Hey! I'm Bethany!

I'm a born and raised Oregon artist, photographer, and moment junkie.

Most days you can find me in a tattered eighties sweater and jeans, cold coffee in hand, chasing my kids.